Parents play a huge role in helping children develop healthy self-esteem. Parents are the first positive voice children hear. To build your child’s self-esteem, help them see what skills or activities they do well.

What we know:

Kids notice how they compare to other kids their age. Talk about what they may notice. For example, you may say. “Sometimes it seems like it’s hard for you to read aloud. I’m sure you see kids in school who read easily, even if you don’t think they’re any smarter than you.” This opens the door for your child to talk about it.  It may also encourage your child to talk about what he or she is “smart” at doing.

Kids need to talk about both what they are good at and what is hard for them. A nice way to talk about skills your child is not good at is to give examples from family members. For example, maybe Mom always loses the car keys. Or Grandpa isn’t patient. Talking about those types of family examples is a great way to talk about strengths and weaknesses.

Try this:

Download Search Institute’s Talk About It cards. The free resource helps children see that there are many ways of learning and to identify their strengths. It also helps children see they can work on skills that are harder for them and get better over time.

For fun:

Read the book “The Dot” by Peter H. Reynolds. This book is about a girl named Vashti who thinks she can’t draw. But, she overcomes her doubts and goes on to inspire others. It may take some time for kids to figure out what they are good at or what things they love to do. Help your child explore those strengths, and give them the time they need to do so. Finding and exploring their passion can build children’s self-esteem.

Print this as a 1-page handout (What Am I Good At?, PDF).